Last Issue Clint targeted us Pipples. As predicted we had a barrage of complaints - none actually - but this time he tells us of his time at the southern woos's fave IMC training destination, Southend

Take it away Clint!

Of all the ATC Units I have worked at I think Southend has to be my favourite. A great little airport and the guys that worked there were just great - so many stories……

Whoop! Whoop!

In ’73, Southend did not have an ILS. Surveillance Radar Approaches were carried out using an EKCO ARAA (Aerodrome Radar Approach Aid) an amazing piece of equipment, manufactured by a local electrical company, E K Cole. It hung from the ceiling of the tower rather like a periscope in a submarine. The operator stood looking into a small ‘A’ scope tube. He was able to follow the aircraft by literally rotating the entire radar receiving unit by turning it on its axis.

Azimuth control was maintained by turning two hand grips either side of the unit. Very, very basic but in the hands of a skilled operator, very accurate. If it was set up precisely, Surveillance Radar Approaches could be carried out down to half a mile with an OCL of about 250 feet. The OCL is the Obstacle Clearance Limit (hands up who didn’t know that). This is the height at which the pilot must instigate a go around or overshoot if he does not have the runway lights in sight. Once the approach was commenced, the controller was committed to it. He stood upright looking into the ‘A’ scope both hands on the azimuth controls and at the same time talking on the R/T. Favourite trick was to wait until the talk down had commenced, then we would loosen the poor unfortunate’s trouser belt so his trousers fell to the floor. He had no spare hands to help himself so the SRA would be conducted with his trousers round his ankles, much to the mirth of everybody else in the tower.

Our game came to an end however when one day the Airport Commandant, appeared in the tower with a party of very influential visitors from Southend Corporation Council. An SRA was in progress and as they climbed the stairs into the VCR (Visual Control Room) they were met by the sight of an Air Traffic Controller conducting a Surveillance Radar Approach to an inbound aircraft in his underpants. I can still see it now as plain as if it was yesterday. The underpants were red and yellow stripes. The red was not quite so vivid as the face of the Commandant or his visitors. He made a polite cough and then made his excuses and left. Of course we did not get away lightly. Within hours a memo appeared that with immediate effect, no Surveillance Radar Approaches would be carried out in ones underpants!!!

Novelty Scarecrows

Because Southend was so close to the sea, seagulls and other sea birds were a constant nuisance on the runway and manoeuvring area. When requested, the airport fire service would come out now and again and fire off a few Very flares to scare away any birds but it was never really very satisfactory. We had our own Very gun in the tower and our own stock of cartridges. We had one window that opened to give a perfect perspective of the airfield. From this window we could fire off cartridges all day long but it meant standing at the open window and leaning out in order to fire the gun. Not a problem to all of us apart from one controller. He liked to sit in the tower with the window open, a box of cartridges buy his side, pistol ready and was happy to say, ‘Cleared to land, cleared to take off, surface wind is………’ all day long. When he saw some sea birds on the runway he went apoplectic. He would launch into this frenzied scramble to load a cartridge into the gun and sit and fire it out of the window. We were not happy with the way he discharged the gun, but his aim seemed good. We would however, have been far happier had he walked over to the open window and then discharged the gun.

Inevitably one day it all turned to tears. He was sitting in the ‘Air’ position and it was not particularly busy. A couple of us were reading the papers in the comfy chairs that every tower has positioned so that they can’t be seen by any pilot airside. He suddenly announced ‘I need a wee’ One of our colleagues, a controller of more advanced years, stood up and said, ‘I’ll take over’ and a handover was effected. Our senior colleague had only been sitting down for a few seconds when he remarked how cold it was it the ‘Air’ position and immediately closed the nearest window. We carried on with our newspapers. After a few minuets there was a stomping up the stairs from the loo and another handover was done. Within minuets there was an expletive about seagulls on the runway. He reached for the gun and loaded the cartridge all in one action such was his rage because seagulls were on his runway.

Pointing the gun at the window he pulled the trigger. It was at this point that we all realised that the window had been shut. We all hit the ground. The cartridge left the pistol and hit the window. With a bit of luck, it would have gone through the glass and exploded outside but no it didn’t - it fell to the ground and then flew round the tower four or five times at waist height bouncing off the windows. The noise and the smell was incredible. Smoke filled the tower. We were all lying flat face down. Just as it ran out of momentum, of course, the final explosion. This was deafening. Luckily it was a quiet time and we were able to evacuate the tower and clear the smoke. Procedures were changed later about how to discharge Very cartridges - we were given a truck to use!

After about a month the truck began to smell and it was a most unpleasant task to have to go out on the airfield in the vehicle and fire off rounds. Then one day someone found the rotting carcase of a rabbit that had been shot on the airfield, put in the back of the truck by someone and forgotten, but it wasn’t me.